Proverbs 6:20-23 (NIV)
Tim. 4:12 (NIV)
When a teen is mature enough to set an example for other believers, then he’s old enough to begin to consider dating.
LEVELS OF DATING and Friendships
Acquaintance ; Casual Friendship ;
Close Friendship ; Intimate Friendship
When Are You Old Enough To Date?
- When your parents agree
- When you are aware of both the benefits AND dangers of dating
- When you have personally worked out from Scripture a set of dating standards
- When you have purposed that you will NOT lower those standards even if it means losing dates.
· EVERY DATE IS A POTENTIAL MATE
PARENTS NEED TO BE INVOLVED
- Eph 6:1-2 – Children obey your parents in the Lord for this is right. Honor your father and your mother.
- Prov 6:20-23 – 2 Lights in your lives. God placed them in your lives and they might know a bit more about life and marriage and relationships than you do! I know that is hard to believe.
IS SEX AS NORMAL AS OXYGEN, EATING and DRINKING AND SLEEP? YES! But there is a distinction
- the denial of sex does not produce harmful physical effects
- the satisfaction of hunger for food or thirst for drink, have no social implications or consequences as does sexual intercourse.
- satisfying sexual hunger involves another person.
- there is no such thing as ‘unstimulated kissing” we cannot control what God created to happen naturally.
THINGS TO LOOK FOR IN THE OTHER
- Is he/she a believer?
- How is their relationship with God?
- Do they have a desire to serve God?
- Does he/she get along with mother/father?
WHAT TO DO NOW
- develop your philosophy in harmony with Christian principles and scientific facts
- set ups some guidelines for dating and courtship.
- plan dates in advance (don’t be spontaneous)
- group participation dates are healthy – plan them
- avoid situations/activities which provoke sexual stimuli
- plan well balanced life – you need personal time
- avoid long engagements
You make friends not lovers
Positive Relationships STEPS
- make sure your motives are pure
- The objectives of the relationship need to be defined upfront.
- Openness and good communication are necessary
- Honesty must be stressed
- Set a proper atmosphere. Don’t let yourself be caught in an awkward situation
- Don’t become trapped by the relationship. Do things with other people.
- Strive to be like Christ and build each other up
- If you don’t have it, don’t touch it.
- Don’t start to get romantically involved. Don’t start something you cannot righteously satisty.
- Pray for the relationship
- Let Christ be in control
One should BE what he/she EXPECTS.
Parent – Child Communication
- Stay under parent’s authority. Rom. 13:1
- Build strong relationship with your parents
- KNOW the person you date is a believer, has a proper understanding of parental authority and has strong convictions and is growing in Christ
1 Thess 4:3-7 – Sexual Purity
Purity Rings and Covenant
Does God have a perfect mate for me?
- Be careful of the “compatibility myth”. No two people are compatible. All are sinners by nature.
- Be careful of thinking that God has a perfect mate for me, therefore I will pray and sit still. Better: List the kind of person you want and then get busy becoming that kind of person yourself.
- Be careful to think that “God will stop me if it’s not His will”
- Be careful of acting after prayer. God still expects you to follow biblical absolutes.
HOW TO PREPARE YOURSELF:
- develop skills, talents and social graces.
- learn biblical love and giving
- take proper care of your physical body, your mind, heart